Title:  The Tooth Is Out There
Author:  Marissa, a.k.a. White Miasma
Rating:  G!  Complete farce!
Spoilers:  none
Summary:  Mulder and Scully investigate the phenomenon know as "The
Tooth Fairy."
Disclaimer:  Mulder and Scully belong to CC, and the Tooth Fairy
belongs to the DOA (Demons Outplacement Agency).  : ]

For my sister, for keeping her nose out of what I'm "always working on." 
For the shippers and their determination.  And for Mulder and all of the
other believers.  (Do we have Scully on our side yet?!?)  Special thanks
to an unknown author who wrote that story about Santa Claus and our
favorite FBI agents. 

WARNING -- WARNING -- FARCE AHEAD -- DO NOT TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY --
WARNING


	T  H  E   T  O  O  T  H   I  S   O  U  T   T  H  E  R  E
		    by Marissa, a.k.a. White Miasma

	"I've seen this before, Scully," Mulder said solemnly.  The two
FBI agents were standing in a child's bedroom.  They looked like giants
among the tiny chairs, miniature bed, and lots of little books and toys
strewn across the floor.  The black of their suits blared from the soft
lavender of the room.  "Legend has it that there is a demon that visits
the house of a child who has just lost a tooth, and I think we're seeing
it right here." 
	"Don't be ridiculous," Scully countered.  "A tiny pink demon who
flies into children's windows and steals their teeth?  Why would it steal
teeth when it could go for . . . oh, the safe?" 
	"Some cultures believe that the reward for stealing teeth is
eternal life.  Why do you think there are so many dentists in the world? 
Besides, Scully, people do all sorts of crazy things.  Why not steal
teeth? Why not?" 
	"But you said this 'person' was a demon," Scully said
triumphantly.  "Why would a demon steal teeth?  Not for eternal life." 
	"No, Scully.  For survival.  When you were a child, what happened
to your teeth after you put them under your pillow?  Did you ever stop to
wonder?" 
	"No, but I suppose you did." 
	"After --"  Mulder's voice cracked, then he resumed speaking. 
"After Samantha's abduction, I questioned everything.  Everything.  And I
found the truth.  This is the work of a demon, Scully.  Here, come take a
look at this."  He picked up a piece of paper with purple scribbles on it. 
	"Mulder, that's a piece of paper that the child who lives in this
room was writing on." 
	"No, no, I can clearly see that this is a message written in
Toothish." 
	"You're making that up." 
	Mulder ignored her.  "It says, 'I will live forever.  Or at least
as long humans have teeth.' That's it!" 
	"What now, Mulder?"  Scully was getting P.O.'d. 
	"It steals teeth from children!" 
	"So what?" 
	"So it's scared that humans will evolve into creatures without
teeth.  Actually, the process has already begun.  I just saw a documentary
yesterday about early infancy, and guess what, Scully!  *The babies didn't
have any teeth.*" 
	"Mulder, children don't have teeth until --" 
	"Oh, Scully, you always think you can explain everything with
science.  But this time, I know I'm right.  The pink demon will strike
again, and all we have to do is be there when it does." 
	"Mulder --" 
	"It needs teeth to survive, Scully.  So it steals them, and builds
vast, glittering white cities.  It eats teeth for breakfast, lunch, and
dinner.  I'll bet that there are millions of tiny pink demons preying on
innocent children." 
	"That is so --" 
	"Come to think of it, Scully, I'll bet they took my sister!  She
had lots of teeth!  They needed her for their food.  Oh, poor Samantha!" 
	"Mulder, if you don't --" 
	"The next plane to Toothland, we're on, Scully.  Are you with me?" 
	Scully sighed.  She wondered how she was going to explain "trip to
Toothland to arrest the Tooth Fairy" on her expense voucher. 

WhiteMiasma@xfilesfan.com
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